Tuesday Fourth Week of Lent
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1 Sam. 16:1, 6-7, 10-13, Psalm 23:1-6, Eph. 5:8-14, John 9:1-41
So a second time they called the man who had been blind and said to him, “Give God the praise! We know this man is a sinner.” He replied, “If he is a sinner, I do not know. One thing I do know is that I was blind and now I see.”
As I reflect on this past Sunday’s gospel (The Man Born Blind) I recall the many times I have been blinded by sin. For much of my life, I have struggled with the sin of perfection. From a young age, the standards for my life were set high. My mother is from the Philippines, and culturally, education and accomplishments are highly respected. My father was in the Air Force, so structure and discipline were elements in our household. There was pressure to be the best in everything I did. There was little to no room for error and straight A’s and being top of the class was a must.
This unrealistic standard for perfection eventually filled every aspect of my life— career, relationships, marriage, and now motherhood. Always needing order and control has brought on a lot of misery. It’s affected my mental and emotional well-being, as well as relationships with my family. When I feel there is disorder or my “perfect standards” are not being met it causes me to be angry, inflexible and hurt the ones I love. Because I have been blinded by my own justifications to constantly have things perfect, I am missing out on God’s graces and joy. Perfectionism brings misery because it tries to control what cannot be controlled, and therefore never allows us to fully enjoy or be present to life. Deep down I know our God is a loving God and accepting of all our flaws and imperfections. So why must I torture myself with these unrealistic standards to constantly be perfect? As I become more aware of this sin of perfection, I strive for ways to free myself of this burden. I turn to the Lord to guide me, most recently with specific prayers like the Litany of Trust and Surrender novena. I too want to love and be open and accepting of flaws just as God does.
If you’re like me and struggle with the sin of perfectionism, these words of Jesus provide great comfort. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. – Matthew 11:28-30”
This Lenten season I’m learning that though we may be blinded by sin it is by surrendering ourselves to Him that we may see more clearly. Each day God gives me opportunities to practice letting go to help overcome my need to be perfect. In what ways are you blinded mentally, physically, emotionally, or spiritually? What ways are you asking the Lord to help you see clearly like the blind man?
Angela King is the wife of Reyn and mother to two beautiful boys, Tucker and Lucas. She and her family relocated to Abilene from L.A. in the fall of 2021. Angela feels so blessed to have found a church family at Holy Family parish.
